How to support families when their kid is suddenly "not into it anymore"
Year 1 was magical. Your new families showed up excited, kids were bouncing off the walls with energy, parents signed up for everything, and you couldn't get them to leave after practice ended.
Then Year 2 hits.
Same kid who couldn't wait for practice last season now "forgets" their cleats. Same parents who were your biggest cheerleaders are suddenly asking if their kid is "really improving" or if maybe they should try a different program. The excitement has worn off, reality has set in, and everyone's wondering if this whole sports thing was a mistake.
Welcome to the Year 2 slump. It's real, it's predictable, and it's actually a sign that families are getting serious about the sport—they're just not sure what "serious" is supposed to look like yet.
Here's the good news: you can prevent most Year 2 dropout by setting realistic expectations before families hit the wall. Let's break down what program directors need to communicate to keep Year 2 families engaged instead of quietly disappearing.
The Year 2 Phenomenon Nobody Talks About
Year 1 is the honeymoon phase. Everything is new and exciting. Kids are learning basic skills, which means visible progress happens fast. Parents are just happy their kid is active and making friends. The bar is low, and everyone's clearing it easily.
Year 2 is when reality shows up uninvited.
Progress slows down because foundational skills are harder to see. The kid who was stoked about making any contact with the ball last year is now frustrated they're not scoring goals. Parents start comparing their kid to teammates and wondering why Johnny seems to be "getting it" faster. The novelty has worn off, and what's left is the actual work of getting better at something.
This is the make-or-break moment. Families who understand this is normal stick around and push through. Families who think something's wrong start looking at other programs or other sports—or worse, they just quit sports entirely.
Your job isn't to make Year 2 easy. Your job is to make Year 2 make sense.
Setting the Stage: What Progress Actually Looks Like in Year 2
The biggest mistake programs make is letting families enter Year 2 with Year 1 expectations. You need to reframe what success looks like before they decide their kid is "falling behind."
What parents expect in Year 2: My kid will be noticeably better, maybe starting, definitely not struggling as much.
What actually happens in Year 2: Skills plateau while fundamentals solidify. Kids who were naturally athletic in Year 1 get caught up by kids who are working harder. Some kids lose interest as the novelty fades and the repetition of practice becomes boring.
What you need to communicate:
"Year 2 is the foundation year. Last season was about exposure and fun—this season is about building the skills that will matter in Year 3 and beyond. Progress might look slower because we're working on technique, not just effort. Your kid might feel frustrated because they're attempting harder skills and failing more. That's not a sign they're struggling—it's a sign they're growing."
The specifics parents need to hear:
Year 2 players should be developing consistency, not just flashes of brilliance. They should understand basic positioning and teamwork concepts, not just individual skills. They should be learning how to practice effectively, which means getting comfortable with repetition and failure.
If your kid is showing up, trying hard, and slowly improving their fundamentals, they're right on track. If they're frustrated because practice feels harder than last year, they're right on track. If they occasionally don't want to go to practice because it's not as "fun" as Year 1, they're still right on track.
Pro move: Create a "Year 2 Skills Checklist" that focuses on fundamentals, not flashy plays. Share it with families at the start of the season so they know what to watch for. When parents can see their kid checking off "improved ball control" or "better positioning awareness," they feel reassured even when progress feels slow.
The Parent Pressure Problem (And How to Defuse It)
Year 2 is when parent anxiety kicks into overdrive. They've invested time and money. They've rearranged schedules. They've watched their kid work hard. And now they're wondering: is it worth it? Is my kid actually good at this? Should we be doing more?
This anxiety shows up as pressure on you, pressure on their kid, and pressure on themselves.
What it looks like:
- "Should we be doing private lessons?"
- "Why isn't my kid starting?"
- "I thought they'd be better by now."
- "Should we switch to a more competitive team?"
What they're really asking: "Am I failing my kid by not doing enough? Or by doing too much? How do I know if this is working?"
Your job: Take the pressure off by reframing what "enough" looks like.
The message families need to hear:
"Year 2 is not the year to ramp up intensity—it's the year to build love of the game while developing fundamentals. The best thing you can do for your kid right now is let them enjoy practice, support their effort (not their outcomes), and trust the process. Private lessons can help if your kid is asking for them, but they're not required for Year 2 players. Starting positions don't define potential at this age—consistency and coachability do."
How to communicate this without sounding dismissive:
Host a "Year 2 Parent Night" at the beginning of the season. Address these concerns proactively before parents spiral into anxiety. Give them permission to relax. Explain that the athletes who thrive long-term aren't the ones who did the most private training in Year 2—they're the ones who stayed engaged and didn't burn out.
Share stories of former players who seemed "average" in Year 2 but became stars in Year 4 because they stuck with it. Help parents understand that development isn't linear, and early success doesn't predict long-term success.
What parents really need: Permission to let their kid be a normal Year 2 player without panicking that they're "falling behind."
When Kids Lose Interest: The "I Don't Want to Go" Conversation
This is the big one. The moment that makes parents question everything.
Halfway through Year 2, their kid—who loved practice last season—suddenly "doesn't feel like it" or "wants to quit" or "just isn't having fun anymore."
Parents panic. Did we push too hard? Not hard enough? Is this sport not right for them? Should we force them to finish the season? What do we do?
What's really happening (most of the time):
Year 1 was easy because everything was new. Year 2 requires actual effort and repetition, which is less immediately gratifying. Kids are learning that getting better requires doing hard things over and over, and that's not always fun in the moment.
This isn't a sign the sport is wrong for them. It's a sign they're at the exact developmental stage where they need to learn perseverance.
What you need to tell parents:
"Almost every Year 2 player goes through an 'I don't want to go' phase. It's not a crisis—it's normal. This is when kids learn that worthwhile things require effort, and that temporary discomfort leads to long-term satisfaction. Your job isn't to make practice fun every single day—it's to help your kid learn to push through when things feel hard."
The framework to share with parents:
Before practice: Don't negotiate. "It's practice day, we're going." Keep it matter-of-fact, not a battle.
After practice: Almost every kid is glad they went. Ask them to notice this: "You didn't want to go, but now how do you feel?" Help them connect effort to satisfaction.
Over time: Most kids push through this phase and rediscover their love for the game. The ones who don't might genuinely be done with this sport—and that's okay too. But don't let them quit in the middle of a slump. Make them finish the season so they learn to honor commitments.
What not to say: "If you don't love it, we should stop." That teaches kids to quit when things get hard. Better message: "Sometimes we do things that are good for us even when we're not in the mood."
Your role as program director:
Make sure your Year 2 practices have moments of fun mixed with skill development. All drilling and no games is a recipe for burnout. But also, don't feel like you have to entertain kids every second. Learning to find satisfaction in hard work is part of the process.
Check in with parents mid-season. Ask how their kid is doing emotionally, not just skill-wise. Normalize the struggle. Let them know other families are going through the same thing.
Creating a "Year 2 Expectations Guide" That Actually Helps
Most programs send a welcome email at the start of the season. Great. But Year 2 families need more than logistics—they need a roadmap for what's coming and how to handle it.
What to include in your Year 2 guide:
Development milestones (what skills should improve this year and what won't yet), emotional milestones (the "I don't want to go" phase is normal and temporary), parent roles (how to support without pressuring, when to step back, what questions to ask coaches), red flags versus normal struggles (how to tell the difference between temporary disinterest and genuine burnout), success stories (examples of past players who struggled in Year 2 but thrived later), and resources (when to consider extra training and when not to, books or articles about youth sports development, how to talk to your kid about effort versus outcomes).
The tone matters here. Don't make it sound like a warning manual. Make it sound like "here's what to expect and how to navigate it successfully." You're giving families a flashlight in a dark room, not scaring them about what's in the shadows.
Send this guide at the beginning of the season. Reference it again mid-season when families hit the rough patch. Make it easily accessible so parents can revisit it when they're questioning everything at 10 PM on a Tuesday.
The Mid-Season Check-In That Saves Families
Here's a secret: most families who quit after Year 2 make that decision silently around mid-season. They don't tell you they're struggling. They just don't register for Year 3.
You can prevent this with one simple practice: proactive mid-season check-ins.
The outreach:
"Hey [parent name], wanted to check in—how's [kid's name] feeling about the season so far? Year 2 can be a tricky adjustment for a lot of families, so I wanted to see if you have any questions or concerns coming up."
Why this works:
You're opening the door for honest conversation before frustration turns into quitting. You're normalizing struggle by acknowledging Year 2 is hard. You're showing families that you care about their experience, not just their registration payment.
What you'll hear:
Some families will say everything's great. Perfect—positive reinforcement helps them stay confident. Some families will mention concerns like their kid being frustrated, not seeing progress, or wondering if they're good enough. This is your opening to reframe expectations and provide reassurance. Some families will reveal they're seriously considering quitting. Now you have a chance to problem-solve before they're gone.
The follow-up:
If a family shares concerns, follow up in 2-3 weeks. "How's [kid] doing since we last talked?" Show continued investment in their success. If a kid is genuinely struggling emotionally or socially (not just skill-wise), work with the family to find solutions. Maybe they need a different practice group, more specific feedback, or just reassurance that they belong.
What you're really doing: Building relationships that outlast one tough season. Families who feel supported through Year 2 become your most loyal long-term participants.
The Year 2 Reality Check: Managing Expectations When the Honeymoon's Over
How to support families when their kid is suddenly "not into it anymore"
Year 1 was magical. Your new families showed up excited, kids were bouncing off the walls with energy, parents signed up for everything, and you couldn't get them to leave after practice ended.
Then Year 2 hits.
Same kid who couldn't wait for practice last season now "forgets" their cleats. Same parents who were your biggest cheerleaders are suddenly asking if their kid is "really improving" or if maybe they should try a different program. The excitement has worn off, reality has set in, and everyone's wondering if this whole sports thing was a mistake.
Welcome to the Year 2 slump. It's real, it's predictable, and it's actually a sign that families are getting serious about the sport—they're just not sure what "serious" is supposed to look like yet.
Here's the good news: you can prevent most Year 2 dropout by setting realistic expectations before families hit the wall. Let's break down what program directors need to communicate to keep Year 2 families engaged instead of quietly disappearing.
The Year 2 Phenomenon Nobody Talks About
Year 1 is the honeymoon phase. Everything is new and exciting. Kids are learning basic skills, which means visible progress happens fast. Parents are just happy their kid is active and making friends. The bar is low, and everyone's clearing it easily.
Year 2 is when reality shows up uninvited.
Progress slows down because foundational skills are harder to see. The kid who was stoked about making any contact with the ball last year is now frustrated they're not scoring goals. Parents start comparing their kid to teammates and wondering why Johnny seems to be "getting it" faster. The novelty has worn off, and what's left is the actual work of getting better at something.
This is the make-or-break moment. Families who understand this is normal stick around and push through. Families who think something's wrong start looking at other programs or other sports—or worse, they just quit sports entirely.
Your job isn't to make Year 2 easy. Your job is to make Year 2 make sense.
Setting the Stage: What Progress Actually Looks Like in Year 2
The biggest mistake programs make is letting families enter Year 2 with Year 1 expectations. You need to reframe what success looks like before they decide their kid is "falling behind."
What parents expect in Year 2: My kid will be noticeably better, maybe starting, definitely not struggling as much.
What actually happens in Year 2: Skills plateau while fundamentals solidify. Kids who were naturally athletic in Year 1 get caught up by kids who are working harder. Some kids lose interest as the novelty fades and the repetition of practice becomes boring.
What you need to communicate:
"Year 2 is the foundation year. Last season was about exposure and fun—this season is about building the skills that will matter in Year 3 and beyond. Progress might look slower because we're working on technique, not just effort. Your kid might feel frustrated because they're attempting harder skills and failing more. That's not a sign they're struggling—it's a sign they're growing."
The specifics parents need to hear:
Year 2 players should be developing consistency, not just flashes of brilliance. They should understand basic positioning and teamwork concepts, not just individual skills. They should be learning how to practice effectively, which means getting comfortable with repetition and failure.
If your kid is showing up, trying hard, and slowly improving their fundamentals, they're right on track. If they're frustrated because practice feels harder than last year, they're right on track. If they occasionally don't want to go to practice because it's not as "fun" as Year 1, they're still right on track.
Pro move: Create a "Year 2 Skills Checklist" that focuses on fundamentals, not flashy plays. Share it with families at the start of the season so they know what to watch for. When parents can see their kid checking off "improved ball control" or "better positioning awareness," they feel reassured even when progress feels slow.
The Parent Pressure Problem (And How to Defuse It)
Year 2 is when parent anxiety kicks into overdrive. They've invested time and money. They've rearranged schedules. They've watched their kid work hard. And now they're wondering: is it worth it? Is my kid actually good at this? Should we be doing more?
This anxiety shows up as pressure on you, pressure on their kid, and pressure on themselves.
What it looks like:
- "Should we be doing private lessons?"
- "Why isn't my kid starting?"
- "I thought they'd be better by now."
- "Should we switch to a more competitive team?"
What they're really asking: "Am I failing my kid by not doing enough? Or by doing too much? How do I know if this is working?"
Your job: Take the pressure off by reframing what "enough" looks like.
The message families need to hear:
"Year 2 is not the year to ramp up intensity—it's the year to build love of the game while developing fundamentals. The best thing you can do for your kid right now is let them enjoy practice, support their effort (not their outcomes), and trust the process. Private lessons can help if your kid is asking for them, but they're not required for Year 2 players. Starting positions don't define potential at this age—consistency and coachability do."
How to communicate this without sounding dismissive:
Host a "Year 2 Parent Night" at the beginning of the season. Address these concerns proactively before parents spiral into anxiety. Give them permission to relax. Explain that the athletes who thrive long-term aren't the ones who did the most private training in Year 2—they're the ones who stayed engaged and didn't burn out.
Share stories of former players who seemed "average" in Year 2 but became stars in Year 4 because they stuck with it. Help parents understand that development isn't linear, and early success doesn't predict long-term success.
What parents really need: Permission to let their kid be a normal Year 2 player without panicking that they're "falling behind."
When Kids Lose Interest: The "I Don't Want to Go" Conversation
This is the big one. The moment that makes parents question everything.
Halfway through Year 2, their kid—who loved practice last season—suddenly "doesn't feel like it" or "wants to quit" or "just isn't having fun anymore."
Parents panic. Did we push too hard? Not hard enough? Is this sport not right for them? Should we force them to finish the season? What do we do?
What's really happening (most of the time):
Year 1 was easy because everything was new. Year 2 requires actual effort and repetition, which is less immediately gratifying. Kids are learning that getting better requires doing hard things over and over, and that's not always fun in the moment.
This isn't a sign the sport is wrong for them. It's a sign they're at the exact developmental stage where they need to learn perseverance.
What you need to tell parents:
"Almost every Year 2 player goes through an 'I don't want to go' phase. It's not a crisis—it's normal. This is when kids learn that worthwhile things require effort, and that temporary discomfort leads to long-term satisfaction. Your job isn't to make practice fun every single day—it's to help your kid learn to push through when things feel hard."
The framework to share with parents:
Before practice: Don't negotiate. "It's practice day, we're going." Keep it matter-of-fact, not a battle.
After practice: Almost every kid is glad they went. Ask them to notice this: "You didn't want to go, but now how do you feel?" Help them connect effort to satisfaction.
Over time: Most kids push through this phase and rediscover their love for the game. The ones who don't might genuinely be done with this sport—and that's okay too. But don't let them quit in the middle of a slump. Make them finish the season so they learn to honor commitments.
What not to say: "If you don't love it, we should stop." That teaches kids to quit when things get hard. Better message: "Sometimes we do things that are good for us even when we're not in the mood."
Your role as program director:
Make sure your Year 2 practices have moments of fun mixed with skill development. All drilling and no games is a recipe for burnout. But also, don't feel like you have to entertain kids every second. Learning to find satisfaction in hard work is part of the process.
Check in with parents mid-season. Ask how their kid is doing emotionally, not just skill-wise. Normalize the struggle. Let them know other families are going through the same thing.
Creating a "Year 2 Expectations Guide" That Actually Helps
Most programs send a welcome email at the start of the season. Great. But Year 2 families need more than logistics—they need a roadmap for what's coming and how to handle it.
What to include in your Year 2 guide:
Development milestones (what skills should improve this year and what won't yet), emotional milestones (the "I don't want to go" phase is normal and temporary), parent roles (how to support without pressuring, when to step back, what questions to ask coaches), red flags versus normal struggles (how to tell the difference between temporary disinterest and genuine burnout), success stories (examples of past players who struggled in Year 2 but thrived later), and resources (when to consider extra training and when not to, books or articles about youth sports development, how to talk to your kid about effort versus outcomes).
The tone matters here. Don't make it sound like a warning manual. Make it sound like "here's what to expect and how to navigate it successfully." You're giving families a flashlight in a dark room, not scaring them about what's in the shadows.
Send this guide at the beginning of the season. Reference it again mid-season when families hit the rough patch. Make it easily accessible so parents can revisit it when they're questioning everything at 10 PM on a Tuesday.
The Mid-Season Check-In That Saves Families
Here's a secret: most families who quit after Year 2 make that decision silently around mid-season. They don't tell you they're struggling. They just don't register for Year 3.
You can prevent this with one simple practice: proactive mid-season check-ins.
The outreach:
"Hey [parent name], wanted to check in—how's [kid's name] feeling about the season so far? Year 2 can be a tricky adjustment for a lot of families, so I wanted to see if you have any questions or concerns coming up."
Why this works:
You're opening the door for honest conversation before frustration turns into quitting. You're normalizing struggle by acknowledging Year 2 is hard. You're showing families that you care about their experience, not just their registration payment.
What you'll hear:
Some families will say everything's great. Perfect—positive reinforcement helps them stay confident. Some families will mention concerns like their kid being frustrated, not seeing progress, or wondering if they're good enough. This is your opening to reframe expectations and provide reassurance. Some families will reveal they're seriously considering quitting. Now you have a chance to problem-solve before they're gone.
The follow-up:
If a family shares concerns, follow up in 2-3 weeks. "How's [kid] doing since we last talked?" Show continued investment in their success. If a kid is genuinely struggling emotionally or socially (not just skill-wise), work with the family to find solutions. Maybe they need a different practice group, more specific feedback, or just reassurance that they belong.
What you're really doing: Building relationships that outlast one tough season. Families who feel supported through Year 2 become your most loyal long-term participants.
What Success Actually Looks Like in Year 2
Let's get specific. Because vague reassurances don't help families who are genuinely wondering if their kid is progressing.
Skill development in Year 2: More consistent execution of basic techniques (even if still imperfect), better understanding of game concepts like spacing and positioning, improved ability to receive and apply coaching feedback, and starting to self-correct mistakes instead of just repeating them.
Emotional and mental development in Year 2: Learning to handle frustration without giving up, developing practice habits (showing up ready, paying attention, trying hard), building coachability (taking feedback without getting defensive), and starting to understand that effort leads to improvement over time.
Social development in Year 2: Forming friendships with teammates beyond just proximity, learning to encourage others even when personally struggling, developing team identity (we're in this together, not just me and my parents), and understanding roles within a team structure.
What's NOT expected in Year 2: Being the best player or starting every game, never struggling or getting frustrated, loving every single practice with unwavering enthusiasm, or mastering advanced skills and dominating competition.
Frame it this way: "If your kid is showing up, working hard, slowly improving their basics, and learning to push through frustration, they're having a successful Year 2—even if it doesn't always feel like it in the moment."
Your Year 2 Communication Strategy
Don't wait until families are struggling to address Year 2 challenges. Build expectation-setting into your program culture from day one.
Pre-season: Send your Year 2 expectations guide, host a parent night addressing common concerns, and set the tone that Year 2 is about foundations, not flash.
Early season: Celebrate effort and consistency, not just outcomes. Share progress updates that highlight fundamental improvements. Reinforce that plateaus are normal and temporary.
Mid-season: Do proactive check-ins with all Year 2 families. Address the "I don't want to go" phase publicly in newsletters or team meetings. Share success stories of kids pushing through similar struggles.
Late season: Recognize growth since the start of season even if progress felt slow. Preview Year 3 so families understand the trajectory. Celebrate kids who stuck with it through the hard parts.
The through-line: Consistent messaging that normalizes struggle, celebrates perseverance, and reframes what success looks like at this stage.
The Bottom Line: Year 2 Is the Filter—Help Families Pass Through It
Year 2 separates families who are in it for the long haul from families who were just trying something new. That's not a bad thing—not every kid needs to play every sport through high school.
But a lot of families quit Year 2 not because the sport is wrong for them, but because they didn't understand what to expect and assumed something was broken.
Your job as program director is to set realistic expectations, normalize the struggle, and support families through the hard parts. When you do this well, more families make it to Year 3—where the magic really starts to happen.
The kids who push through Year 2 are the ones who develop grit, learn to love the process, and stick with things when they're hard. Those are the athletes (and humans) who thrive long-term.
So don't sugarcoat Year 2. Prepare families for it. Give them the framework to navigate it successfully. And be there when they hit the rough patch so they know they're not alone.
Because the programs that keep families engaged through Year 2 aren't the ones with the best facilities or the most wins. They're the ones that make families feel supported, informed, and confident that temporary struggle is part of the path to long-term success.
Ian Goldberg is the CEO of Signature Media and the Editor of the largest and fastest growing sports parenting newsletter. He’s been recognized as an industry expert by the National Alliance for Youth Sports, the US Olympic Committee’s Truesport, and the Aspen Institute's Project Play. Ian is also a suburban NJ sports dad of two teenage daughters and has over 2,000 hours of volunteer time coaching them (which he calls the most fun form of R&D for his newsletter content). Ian and his team provide players, coaches, parents and program directors with the articles and content they need to have a great sports season. Ian has spent most of his career in digital product development and marketing and got his start at the White House where he worked for the economic advisors to two US Presidents.
