Everyone knows the drill. Registration closes, the season starts, and then the fundraising asks begin. Sell these candles. Buy this coupon book. Sign up for shifts at the snack bar. Oh, and there's a mandatory $200 fundraising credit, but you can buy it out for $250 if you'd rather not participate.
Families smile and comply. And quietly, trust erodes.
The problem isn't that programs need money. They do. Youth sports are expensive to run, and registration fees rarely cover everything. The problem is how fundraising gets structured and communicated. When it feels like an obligation layered on top of an already-expensive commitment, families start to wonder what they're actually paying for. When it shows up mid-season as a surprise, it feels like a bait-and-switch. When participation is "mandatory" but opting out costs extra, it feels like a penalty for not having time.
None of this means you should stop fundraising. It means you should fundraise in ways that build community rather than strain it.
Why Traditional Fundraising Burns Trust
The classic model goes something like this: families are assigned a fundraising obligation, usually framed as a dollar amount or a number of volunteer hours. They can fulfill it by selling products, working events, or soliciting donations. If they don't hit the target, they owe the difference.
On paper, this seems fair. Everyone contributes. The program gets funded. But in practice, it creates problems.
It penalizes busy families. The parents working multiple jobs or managing packed schedules can't spend weekends selling wrapping paper or staffing concession stands. They end up paying the buyout, which feels like a fee for being too busy. Meanwhile, families with more flexibility fulfill their obligations and quietly resent the ones who "just wrote a check."
It obscures the true cost of participation. When registration is $300 but the real cost with fundraising obligations is closer to $500, families feel misled. They budgeted for one number and got another. That's a trust problem, even if everything was technically disclosed in the fine print.
It creates awkward social dynamics. Asking friends, neighbors, and coworkers to buy overpriced popcorn gets old fast. Families start dreading the fundraising cycle, and that dread colors their whole experience with the program.
It signals that the program is struggling. Constant fundraising asks can make families wonder whether their fees are being managed well. Even if the budget is fine, the perception of desperation is hard to shake.
The goal isn't to eliminate fundraising. It's to structure it in ways that don't create these side effects.
Program-Level Sponsor Drives
One of the cleanest fundraising models shifts the ask away from families and toward local businesses.
Instead of asking each family to sell products or solicit donations, the program runs a coordinated sponsor drive. Local businesses contribute in exchange for visibility: banners at fields, logos on jerseys, mentions in newsletters, recognition at events.
This works for a few reasons.
Businesses expect to be asked. Sponsorship requests are a normal part of operating a local business. They're not surprised or annoyed when a youth sports program reaches out. Many actively want to support community organizations and appreciate a clear way to do it.
It removes the burden from families. Parents aren't hitting up their coworkers or standing outside grocery stores. The program handles outreach centrally, which is more efficient and less exhausting for everyone.
It creates a clean story. Sponsor dollars can be earmarked for specific purposes: scholarships for families who need assistance, equipment upgrades, facility improvements. That gives sponsors something concrete to support and gives families confidence that the money is going somewhere meaningful.
It's renewable. A business that sponsors one season is likely to sponsor the next. Over time, you build a base of recurring support that doesn't require starting from scratch every year.
Running a sponsor drive takes effort, but it's concentrated effort rather than distributed hassle. One person or a small committee can manage outreach, fulfillment, and recognition. Families benefit without being asked to do anything.
Event-Based Fundraising
Another model that tends to land well is fundraising tied to events people actually want to attend.
A skills competition. A 3v3 tournament night. A parent-kid game. An end-of-season awards cookout with a silent auction. These are experiences, not obligations. Families show up because they want to, not because they have to.
The fundraising component can take different forms. Entry fees or ticket sales. Concession sales. Raffles or auctions. Donation opportunities tied to the event. The key is that the event itself has value independent of the fundraising. People aren't buying overpriced candles to hit a quota. They're participating in something fun and community-building, with money raised as a byproduct.
Event-based fundraising also creates visibility for your program. A well-run tournament or skills night brings families together, showcases your athletes, and generates goodwill that extends beyond the dollars raised.
The trade-off is that events take planning and coordination. They're not passive income. But the energy invested tends to feel worthwhile because it's building something people enjoy rather than extracting something people resent.
The Transparent Opt-Out
Some programs still need or want a per-family fundraising component. That's fine, as long as it's handled transparently.
The key is disclosure at registration, not mid-season. Families should know before they commit what the total financial obligation looks like, including any fundraising expectations and the cost to opt out.
Frame it honestly. "Registration is $350. Every family is also expected to contribute $150 in fundraising or volunteer hours. If you'd prefer to opt out, you can pay $150 at registration instead." That's clear. That's upfront. That lets families make informed decisions.
What burns trust is the mid-season surprise. Registration closes, the season starts, and then families learn about the fundraising obligation they didn't fully understand. Even if it was mentioned somewhere in the paperwork, the timing feels like a trap.
The opt-out should also be genuinely optional, not framed as a penalty for non-participation. Some families will have more time than money. Others will have more money than time. A healthy program accommodates both without making either feel like they're doing it wrong.
Matching the Ask to the Purpose
Families respond better to fundraising when they understand what the money is for.
"We're raising money" is vague and uninspiring. "We're raising money to fund scholarships so every kid who wants to play can" is specific and motivating. "We're raising money to replace the equipment that's falling apart" gives people something concrete to support.
When the purpose is clear, fundraising feels like an invitation to contribute to something meaningful. When the purpose is unclear, it feels like the program just needs more cash and families are the source.
This is especially important for larger asks. If you're running a capital campaign or a major fundraising push, families need to see where the money is going and why it matters. Transparency builds trust. Vagueness erodes it.
What to Stop Doing
If your current fundraising model is straining relationships, it might be time to cut some things.
Product sales that nobody wants to do. If families dread the annual wrapping paper drive, and participation is declining, and the margins aren't even that good, maybe it's not worth preserving. The energy spent managing a dying fundraiser could be redirected toward something that actually works.
Mandatory obligations with punitive buyouts. If the buyout feels like a fine, you've structured it wrong. Either make the buyout genuinely optional and reasonably priced, or reconsider whether mandatory fundraising is the right model for your program.
Mid-season surprises. Whatever your fundraising expectations are, communicate them before registration closes. Families deserve to know the full cost of participation upfront.
Constant asks. If families are getting hit with fundraising requests every few weeks, fatigue sets in fast. Consolidate your efforts into fewer, more intentional campaigns rather than a steady drip of asks that train families to tune you out.
Fundraising as Community Building
The best fundraising doesn't feel like fundraising. It feels like being part of something.
A sponsor drive that supports scholarships makes families proud of the program's values. An event that brings the community together creates memories alongside revenue. A transparent opt-out respects families' time and circumstances. A clear purpose gives people a reason to contribute beyond obligation.
Your program needs money. That's not going to change. But how you raise that money shapes how families feel about being part of your community. Get it right and fundraising becomes a source of connection. Get it wrong and it becomes a source of resentment that lingers long after the checks clear.
The goal isn't to stop asking. It's to ask in ways that families can feel good about saying yes to.
Ian Goldberg is the CEO of Signature Media and the Editor of the largest and fastest growing sports parenting newsletter. He’s been recognized as an industry expert by the National Alliance for Youth Sports, the US Olympic Committee’s Truesport, and the Aspen Institute's Project Play. Ian is also a suburban NJ sports dad of two teenage daughters and has over 2,000 hours of volunteer time coaching them (which he calls the most fun form of R&D for his newsletter content). Ian and his team provide players, coaches, parents and program directors with the articles and content they need to have a great sports season. Ian has spent most of his career in digital product development and marketing and got his start at the White House where he worked for the economic advisors to two US Presidents.
